BM thinks she gets a say in if SD lives with her boyfriend or not

[Guest]

SD is 18 and in college. After this semester she is going to live in an apartment with her boyfriend instead of the dorms. It will actually be a lot cheaper and without some of the silly rules her dorm has.

BM is trying to tell her no. That she will NOT move in with her boyfriend because she is too young. She forbids it. SD laughed in her face and told her to get over it. BM is now in some weird crazy mode trying to do everything in her power to get this to stop including calling all sorts of family member to get them to "talk some sense" into SD. She called DH, me, my in laws, and even my daughter.

This is totally out of character for her. I wont say she is perfect or anything but she has never acted like this. She has always been very religious and likes things to be very traditional. SD is not that way at all and it has always bothered BM but she mostly stayed in her own lane. I think she has just lost it and is so frantic that she is acting crazy.

I dont think any of us really love the idea of her moving in with her boyfriend.... but she is an adult, she is in college, she is very intelligent and motivated, and her boyfriend is a good guy. I am sure they are already having S*x. She has been on birth control for years and they have been together since they were 16. They wanted to move in together last semester but they had to live in the dorms so that wasnt an option

SD told her to cut the crap or she would not even talk to her anymore which has made it worse.

I do feel for BM because I would be devastated if my kids told me that and I am sure she will not feel good about all of this when she comes back to her senses.

[bmw29]

Unless she's paying for her daughter's schooling I guess she's SOL.

[KaiandKadensMama]

At 18 the girl doesn’t need permission.

[AllofFive19]

Some can never cut the string

[Pjmm]

Does she have good reason to dislike the fellow? Ds was at one time dating a girl who really wasn't good for him. If he'd moved in with her I'd had asked family members to speak to him too. Maybe nothing would have come of it but I would have tried. If that makes me helicopter mom or something whatever.

[Guest]

Who pays for her college costs? If SD pays for herself, her mom really doesn't have a say. If Mom is paying, she can either accept her daughter's living choices or she could tell her daughter to fund her living arrangements on her own.

[mrsmacgiver]

Sucky situation, all around.

[carterscutie85]

So she's either divorced or had a child out of wedlock, and wants to preach to SD about following religion and tradition? Lol.

[Guest]

Who pays for her college costs? If SD pays for herself, her mom really doesn't have a say. If Mom is paying, she can either accept her daughter's living choices or she could tell her daughter to fund her living arrangements on her own.

SD has some scholarships and a college fund. BM has paid money into that fund and is not happy that SD will be using her money while living with her boyfriend but really BM has no control over that money now

[Danesmommy1]

If I was paying for college, she sure as shit wouldn't get my money while shacking up with some dude. No, my monetary support comes with strings.