The stresses and worries of being a first time mom

[mamamia03]

Hey guys, I need some help and encouragement. I am 37 weeks pregnant and I feel like I am failing at this mom thing. When it comes to dealing with all of the feelings of being a new mom I can often feel discouraged about the changes going on with my body. I will often find myself scrolling on tiktok and see mothers who have posted about how much colostrum that they pump or express each day and it actually discourages me and makes me jealous. I only get a few drops out, nothing compared to the syringes full of fluid from other women. I mean am I doing it wrong or do I just not produce enough for my baby? It is something that I am not doing or is it just normal to have drops of colostrum before baby is born. I also am getting impatient, I want to meet my son and I just want him born. I know that is normal but I am afraid that when he is here, I will not have the tools to be able to take care of him. I am also feeling so bored (which i should be thankful for the time I have now to myself) but my body is just craving the time with my son, I don't know what to do with my day so I will often read until my husband gets home. I am also very exhausted, like everyday! I just don't have the energy anymore, I am hoping the energy comes back but for now I feel like I need like 300 naps a day! I mean shouldn't I be savoring this time to myself? I find it so difficult to do when it feels like I am failing at the simple tasks that I am preparing my body for.

[carterscutie85]

I had zero leakage before either of my kids were born. Once you give birth and start nursing trust me they will fill up lol. Exhaustion is completely normal, so is boredom. And don't stress about not being a good Mom. Just the fact that you are worried about it shows that you already are. Bad Moms don't worry about being a good parent because they don't care.

[Anonymous 1]

If you can scroll tik toc you can scroll google.

Milk doesn’t come in till you have the baby and hormones tell it to drop.

Expressing milk is not an indication of breast production. Not all women can express.

As to most of your other fears…. Most Moms have the same ones. It works out.

[KendallsMom]

You're overthinking everything.

And stop comparing yourself to people on Tic Tock.

Just relax and enjoy every moment.

Everything is going to be ok.

[Inmybizz]

Get off TikTok and enjoy your pregnancy. I would suggest you find a moms group in your area or some type of support group for first time moms.

Remember motherhood is a journey there will be ups and downs… stay true to your course because we all approach motherhood differently.. as long as your child is taken care of and you take care of yourself it’s all good.

[Heyteacher]

Here is the truth there will be days when you know you are failing f your child. There will be days you know you knocked it out od the park. There will be days when all you did was survive it. However your son will look at you on each of those and be so full of love that you will realize that in the end NONE of what we worry about matters.

Here is what does matter—self care for you. Sleep. Trust me, those first weeks are a blue that until you experience it, you can’t understand. Feeding baby—and this doesn’t matter how. Honestly, bottle or breast a fed baby who is gaining weight is what matters. Spend tons of hours just loving on this new life. I’m a year you will look back and discover that it really did go by so fast.

[Anonymous 2]

It is normal to be stressing about motherhood but please don't get your information off tiktoc. Generally, your breast milk will come in after you give birth - colostrum the first 2-4 days, then transitional milk, then regular milk after 14 days.

Breast feeding can initially be challenging for both a new mom and baby. I recommend contacting your local La Leche League and ask for information. I also recommend that you contact the hospital or birthing center where you plan to give birth and explain that you wish to breast feed but are nervous and would like to have a consult/assistance after giving birth. Generally, this is automatically provided but it's good to give them a heads up.

It is unusual for women to express colostrum prior to giving birth but some doctors recommend that women who have gestational diabetes express colostrum prior to giving birth. If you have gestational diabetes and your doctor has recommended that you express colostrum now, then speak with you doctor about how best to express and how much you should be expecting. Again, Le Leche can help.

[Pjmm]

People on Tiktok might be lying through their tiny teeth. I’d take anything they said with a shaker of salt. The rest is normal and others have given good advice. Find a moms group and remember when you’re stressed this too shall pass.

[Deleted User 1990]

If you’re still pregnant the milk won’t start until after the baby is born

[Deleted User 2088]

I had so much colostrum while pregnant with my first that I could literally shoot it across the room. I also produced so much milk with my second child that he would choke. Neither of those is super typical. And not producing colostrum while you're pregnant doesn't mean you'll have a hard time breastfeeding, just like producing a lot doesn't mean you'll have an easy time breastfeeding.

You're overthinking it, that's all.