I am not paying BM child support

[Bubbs]

BMs goes into a separate account set up by the CS office.

They aren't going without stuff because we buy them everything.

BM brags about how it is her money. She is still bitter over the fact that she never got alimony. She sees it as her money not for the kids.

Then stop buying them everything. I don't know another solution. The court will never care what she does with the money. If they have a home, and utilities then that could be what the child support goes too. You don't actually know. You just know what she says.

I have no problem getting things for the kids. That isnt the problem. BM doesnt pay the bills at her house, her boyfriend does. I am against paying the CS which is why DH can deal with that.

You aren't obligated to pay it. I wish someone would pay my bills LOL

[MrsDavidB]

BMs goes into a separate account set up by the CS office.

They aren't going without stuff because we buy them everything.

BM brags about how it is her money. She is still bitter over the fact that she never got alimony. She sees it as her money not for the kids.

Then stop buying them everything. I don't know another solution. The court will never care what she does with the money. If they have a home, and utilities then that could be what the child support goes too. You don't actually know. You just know what she says.

I have no problem getting things for the kids. That isnt the problem. BM doesnt pay the bills at her house, her boyfriend does. I am against paying the CS which is why DH can deal with that.

Who cares if her boyfriend pays all the bills. Would you feel differently if he was her husband? Because it doesn't matter. The kids have a roof and electric and I assume a nice home life there or otherwise your husband would file to have them live at his home, right?

[Oliviasmom72]

I wouldn’t pay it either but your DH is going to be in arrears.

[Anonymous 1]

Then stop buying them everything. I don't know another solution. The court will never care what she does with the money. If they have a home, and utilities then that could be what the child support goes too. You don't actually know. You just know what she says.

I have no problem getting things for the kids. That isnt the problem. BM doesnt pay the bills at her house, her boyfriend does. I am against paying the CS which is why DH can deal with that.

Who cares if her boyfriend pays all the bills. Would you feel differently if he was her husband? Because it doesn't matter. The kids have a roof and electric and I assume a nice home life there or otherwise your husband would file to have them live at his home, right?

Not at all. I'm just saying she isn't putting he money towards bills. He has been her boyfriend for 11 years now. He's a great person and I have nothing against him.

[Anonymous 1]

I wouldn’t pay it either but your DH is going to be in arrears.

No he won't. He will just have to dip into savings.

[Anonymous 2]

I dont blame you. You need to take care of your own kids and DH need to talk to the courts about getting it reduced in the meantime.

[Baconqueen13]

On the one hand it isn't your responsibility to pay CS, it is his. So on that I'm with you. That said HE still needs to pay it regardless of his job status, that means taking it to court and having the amount dropped if need be due to his unemployed status. It doesn't matter what BM spends the money on. If she already pays for the kids needs than that money is merely reimbursement to her for taking care of it all and she can spend it however she wants, get over it.

Why should she get reimbursement for taking care of the kids though? DH doesn't get any reimbursement.

Because that is what the courts decided based on the difference between their income and who has the kids the most, etc. Consider it his payment for him having BM take more care of the kids or his "get of of parenting fee" whatever, but it is his responsibility to provide that money because he decided to take his dick out of his pants and spawn kids with BM. If he doesn't like it he needs to go back to court and get it amended. Otherwise he needs to STFU and pay

[Anonymous 1]

On the one hand it isn't your responsibility to pay CS, it is his. So on that I'm with you. That said HE still needs to pay it regardless of his job status, that means taking it to court and having the amount dropped if need be due to his unemployed status. It doesn't matter what BM spends the money on. If she already pays for the kids needs than that money is merely reimbursement to her for taking care of it all and she can spend it however she wants, get over it.

Why should she get reimbursement for taking care of the kids though? DH doesn't get any reimbursement.

Because that is what the courts decided based on the difference between their income and who has the kids the most, etc. Consider it his payment for him having BM take more care of the kids or his "get of of parenting fee" whatever, but it is his responsibility to provide that money because he decided to take his dick out of his pants and spawn kids with BM. If he doesn't like it he needs to go back to court and get it amended. Otherwise he needs to STFU and pay

Well they have the kids equally. He makes less than BM does now. Maybe she will have to pay him for once if he takes it to court.

[Baconqueen13]

Why should she get reimbursement for taking care of the kids though? DH doesn't get any reimbursement.

Because that is what the courts decided based on the difference between their income and who has the kids the most, etc. Consider it his payment for him having BM take more care of the kids or his "get of of parenting fee" whatever, but it is his responsibility to provide that money because he decided to take his dick out of his pants and spawn kids with BM. If he doesn't like it he needs to go back to court and get it amended. Otherwise he needs to STFU and pay

Well they have the kids equally. He makes less than BM does now. Maybe she will have to pay him for once if he takes it to court.

Yes, having no income would mean he makes less than her now and thus he should take it to court to have it amended, otherwise he needs to STFU and figure out how he's going to pay. Is it your responsibility? No. Can the courts still decide he has to pay, YES

[Anonymous 1]

Because that is what the courts decided based on the difference between their income and who has the kids the most, etc. Consider it his payment for him having BM take more care of the kids or his "get of of parenting fee" whatever, but it is his responsibility to provide that money because he decided to take his dick out of his pants and spawn kids with BM. If he doesn't like it he needs to go back to court and get it amended. Otherwise he needs to STFU and pay

Well they have the kids equally. He makes less than BM does now. Maybe she will have to pay him for once if he takes it to court.

Yes, having no income would mean he makes less than her now and thus he should take it to court to have it amended, otherwise he needs to STFU and figure out how he's going to pay. Is it your responsibility? No. Can the courts still decide he has to pay, YES

He is still going to pay it. He just doesnt want to use savings.