Found this in a group, what’s your take? How would you handle it?

[Anonymous 5]

I’d be telling my husband that SD isn’t the only person in the family and that he better go. If he didn’t we’d be in counseling to figure out what his daughter is more important that all other members of the family. I’d still take the other kids but I’d probably take a good friend or my mom with me.

[hockeymom87]

Dad made his pick. I'd leave the kids with him and go alone.

There an idea. Take a friend have a girls trip. If the kids complain say well dad wanted to stay home with the kids.

[Anonymous 2]

A LOT of good points made by you!

If I had to do it over again, I would definitely not marry a man who had children. I always say that the only way I'd consider doing it is if the mother of his children was deceased. Even the nicest of women aren't always easy to work with when it comes to their children.

I agree that a cruise in the middle of the school year doesn't sound like a good idea and one that our school would probably not approve.

For several reasons, a relationship between a step mom and a step daughter is often more difficult than one between a step mom and step son. And let me tell you, if you find yourself in a relationship with a man where there's issues between you and his daughter, you are in for the bumpiest of rides. It is not a pleasant thing.

If the only reason dad is declining to go on this cruise is because his SD doesn't wish to, I think he's wrong to not go. This kind of crap occurred in my marriage often. If I had to do it over again, I would not tolerate it and I'd leave the marriage if he insisted that I do.

If you're dating a man who has children from a prior marriage, date him for a very long time. And pay attention to the choices he makes. If you think his priorities don't align with yours, you are probably right. And if that's the case, run the other way! Children matter. But so should your spouse.

My take won't be popular but it's honest. There are reasons not to marry a man with an ex and children. This is one of them. They guy either puts the ex and kids ahead of everyone or forgets them and concentrates solely on the shiny new wife and her kids. Next, it would not occur to me to pull kids out of school for a week to go on a cruise of all things. I can see taking a day off to recharge or whatever but a week long cruise during the school year is ridiculous and unnecessary. Lastly, we have the whine from wife #2 about how hubby doesn't support her and she's so picked on. We have no idea what this woman's relationship is like with her husband's daughter but from this I'd say it's not good. There is likely a long and unpleasant backstory that would make this all clear.

[MonkeySeeMonkeyDo]

Is that really true? I don't cruise but I've flown my children all over the world without their father and never needed anything but their passport.

Unless the cruise company has the child's birth certificate, how would they even know? Seems odd to me!

I'm not sure why SD's mother outranks her father. Depending on the legal situation it could be that he can't really override her decision, but otherwise I don't get it.

When cruising you need a letter from the parent not going that says they give permission for the kid to go.

If mom refuses to sign off on it then they are a bit stuck.

That’s what carnival told us if we wanted to sail with my husbands kids.

[LiveWhatULove]

Her situation sucks.

I don't want to make my DH sound "ball-less", BUT he damn well knows, if I say, "we are going on this cruise", or really on any trip, his role in our relationship is to say, "that's great, love, let me know when we leave." He'd never ever say, "ehhh, not going to go on a trip that is important to you." And honestly, I'd show him the same respect.

[Vegaswife2011]

My husband has and would leave his son home. If I were you I’d take the kids and have a good time. Sorry he’s being like this.

[Pjmm]

Is that really true? I don't cruise but I've flown my children all over the world without their father and never needed anything but their passport.

Unless the cruise company has the child's birth certificate, how would they even know? Seems odd to me!

I'm not sure why SD's mother outranks her father. Depending on the legal situation it could be that he can't really override her decision, but otherwise I don't get it.

When cruising you need a letter from the parent not going that says they give permission for the kid to go.

If mom refuses to sign off on it then they are a bit stuck.

I'm divorced but I did have to give my ex a letter when he took the kids on a cruise. Idk if he had to show it. I do remember he freaked because I said one of the kids had a cold before they sailed. He acted like it was my fault if they wouldn't let him aboard ship. Like I'm Jesus or something and can control this lol. That's what travel insurance is for my friend. In the end they went.

[mojogirl]

Dad made his pick. I'd leave the kids with him and go alone.

There an idea. Take a friend have a girls trip. If the kids complain say well dad wanted to stay home with the kids.

or perhaps a singles cruise

[MrsDavidB]

I'm not sure why SD's mother outranks her father. Depending on the legal situation it could be that he can't really override her decision, but otherwise I don't get it.

When cruising you need a letter from the parent not going that says they give permission for the kid to go.

If mom refuses to sign off on it then they are a bit stuck.

I have never been asked for such a letter and I have taken my son I had with my ex-husband many times and even taken his friends along with none of his parents on board. I understand the letter may be good to have-but I have never been asked for such a letter.

[MrsDavidB]

No-it's not true. As long as one of the natural parents are there nothing is asked. Like you said they don't know.

Is that really true? I don't cruise but I've flown my children all over the world without their father and never needed anything but their passport.

Unless the cruise company has the child's birth certificate, how would they even know? Seems odd to me!

I'm not sure why SD's mother outranks her father. Depending on the legal situation it could be that he can't really override her decision, but otherwise I don't get it.

When cruising you need a letter from the parent not going that says they give permission for the kid to go.

If mom refuses to sign off on it then they are a bit stuck.