DD was expelled and I don't know why

[Anonymous 1]

She won't tell me and neither will the school. I thought she was leading to go back to the dorms in a few weeks

I felt a weird vibe when I started talking about the tuition payment. She said she would handle it herself. She just wanted me to hand over $19,000 to her. When I told her I would just do it online like last time she freaked out

She admitted to being expelled. I didn't even want to believe her at first until she showed me part of the official email she got from the school. She can go back in a year after having a hearing but she doesn't want to

She keeps saying she did nothing wrong and they are overreacting which I doubt is the case

So she has been home lying about school and how her classes are and being excited to go back. She said her plan was to take the money for school and get her own place and pretend like she was still taking classes

I'm not even sure how to handle this situation or what to do. She has no job and kicking her out doesn't seem like a good option with how hot it is. The shelters are full and she doesn't have many friends here

I'm in shock

[Anonymous 2]

Is it possible it was over drugs? If so, that needs to be your first focus.

[stilltfez]

time to change up your plans for her. If she stays in your home, she works full time and repays you last semester's lost $. she also pays rent and reasonable living costs (food/bills/car insurance etc) you and her dad figure out how to get that information from the school, or get it from her, discuss and address it. unless she flunked out there would have to be a solid reason for expulsion. schools do not just expel for vague reasons.

[Conweis]

I would tell my daughter to get a job or start applying to community college. She lied continuously and then tried to steal from you.

[Anonymous 1]

Is it possible it was over drugs? If so, that needs to be your first focus.

I mean I guess it could be. I haven't noticed any signs of drug use but I didn't notice she was expelled either

What would you recommend I do? I doubt she would take a drug test if I asked

[Anonymous 1]

time to change up your plans for her. If she stays in your home, she works full time and repays you last semester's lost $. she also pays rent and reasonable living costs (food/bills/car insurance etc) you and her dad figure out how to get that information from the school, or get it from her, discuss and address it. unless she flunked out there would have to be a solid reason for expulsion. schools do not just expel for vague reasons.

There is no way for us to get info from the school unless she gives permission. She said it is none of our business.

We live in a pretty high cost of living area so if we rent to her it is likely she will never leave. At least that is my concern. She already said she isn't getting a job. I feel trapped. Part of me thinks the only way is to kick her out but I'm worried about what would happen if I did.

[Anonymous 1]

I would tell my daughter to get a job or start applying to community college. She lied continuously and then tried to steal from you.

She said she isn't getting a job.

[MonkeySeeMonkeyDo]

I’d be pissed, and the stunt she tried to pull over the money? I’d consider that trying to steal from you.

[Anonymous 3]

Why on earth is she refusing to get a job?

[Anonymous 1]

Why on earth is she refusing to get a job?

She is being stubborn and it seems like she is trying to prove how much control she has