ETA Girl, I love you but you’re F***ing helpless....

[Nopeville]

yes but people should probably have some shame about their lack of self sufficiency or at least not be pissy when someone mocks them for it. I cannot imagine having a nanny and still not being able to function alone with my kids. Lord.

Why? Not everyone needs to pretend they're super mom. Her house runs differently than yours or or OP's. It doesn't make yours better. Things obviously go just fine most of the time. Everyone has days where things don't go the way they want and they get overwhelmed. Mentioning that doesn't make her weak or a bad parent.

Agreed that everyone has off days. But I am getting the sense this is more that she is one of those moms I knew at the daycare that literally never were alone with their kids. They left them at the daycare all day and then had a nanny for nights and weekends.

We had a few like that and they admitted they never could handle their kids alone. And that is ridiculous

Why is that ridiculous? Because you deemed it so? I think it's ridiculous when father's work 12 + hours a day and don't spend anytime with their wives or kids. However, in reality, not my house, not my business. There are a lot of ways to raise kids who grow into productive adults. If this family wants to do it with a nanny and dad actually parenting his kids too, instead of mom doing all the heavy lifting, more power to them.

[RedBottoms]

Why? Not everyone needs to pretend they're super mom. Her house runs differently than yours or or OP's. It doesn't make yours better. Things obviously go just fine most of the time. Everyone has days where things don't go the way they want and they get overwhelmed. Mentioning that doesn't make her weak or a bad parent.

Agreed that everyone has off days. But I am getting the sense this is more that she is one of those moms I knew at the daycare that literally never were alone with their kids. They left them at the daycare all day and then had a nanny for nights and weekends.

We had a few like that and they admitted they never could handle their kids alone. And that is ridiculous

Why is that ridiculous? Because you deemed it so? I think it's ridiculous when father's work 12 + hours a day and don't spend anytime with their wives or kids. However, in reality, not my house, not my business. There are a lot of ways to raise kids who grow into productive adults. If this family wants to do it with a nanny and dad actually parenting his kids too, instead of mom doing all the heavy lifting, more power to them.

I think it's fine to have a nanny and have dad help. BUT as a mom you should still be able to function temporarily on your own without melting down. A parent should be able to handle their own kids alone.

[Deleted User 638]

Agreed that everyone has off days. But I am getting the sense this is more that she is one of those moms I knew at the daycare that literally never were alone with their kids. They left them at the daycare all day and then had a nanny for nights and weekends.

We had a few like that and they admitted they never could handle their kids alone. And that is ridiculous

Why is that ridiculous? Because you deemed it so? I think it's ridiculous when father's work 12 + hours a day and don't spend anytime with their wives or kids. However, in reality, not my house, not my business. There are a lot of ways to raise kids who grow into productive adults. If this family wants to do it with a nanny and dad actually parenting his kids too, instead of mom doing all the heavy lifting, more power to them.

I think it's fine to have a nanny and have dad help. BUT as a mom you should still be able to function temporarily on your own without melting down. A parent should be able to handle their own kids alone.

There's nothing to indicate she's having a meltdown. She said something about managing the kids' schedules on her own. To me that sounds more like she can't be in two places at one time than someone having a meltdown.

[luvthagirl]

yes but people should probably have some shame about their lack of self sufficiency or at least not be pissy when someone mocks them for it. I cannot imagine having a nanny and still not being able to function alone with my kids. Lord.

I don't understand the need to mock her or shame her because she needs a nanny. Yes she should be more self sufficient but she's not. Some need more help than others and as long as she can afford the nanny whatever. She's lucky and her dh sounds wonderful you ask me. Sure I would be annoyed that she is asking me to go out of my way but all I have to do is say yes or no. And wish that I had her dh lol.

And I would not come get her kid either then. Why should I do more work when I don't even have a nanny?

I wouldn't make the kid suffer, I would pick him up & drop him off just so my kid could enjoy a playdate with his friend. This kid Mother and whether or not she had a nanny wouldn't even be a factor

[Nopeville]

Agreed that everyone has off days. But I am getting the sense this is more that she is one of those moms I knew at the daycare that literally never were alone with their kids. They left them at the daycare all day and then had a nanny for nights and weekends.

We had a few like that and they admitted they never could handle their kids alone. And that is ridiculous

Why is that ridiculous? Because you deemed it so? I think it's ridiculous when father's work 12 + hours a day and don't spend anytime with their wives or kids. However, in reality, not my house, not my business. There are a lot of ways to raise kids who grow into productive adults. If this family wants to do it with a nanny and dad actually parenting his kids too, instead of mom doing all the heavy lifting, more power to them.

I think it's fine to have a nanny and have dad help. BUT as a mom you should still be able to function temporarily on your own without melting down. A parent should be able to handle their own kids alone.

Nobody said she was having a meltdown. She just said she couldn't chauffeur the kid to a playdate, because she was juggling other things. Sometimes, I just don't want to take my kid to a playdate. Whether because of not wanting to shuffle other things around or because I don't want to get out of my bathrobe really doesn't matter. If someone is willing to come get them great. If not, ok they can get together another time. It doesn't make me a bad parent to refuse to add one more thing to my plate when I'm already busy.

[Pjmm]

yes but people should probably have some shame about their lack of self sufficiency or at least not be pissy when someone mocks them for it. I cannot imagine having a nanny and still not being able to function alone with my kids. Lord.

I don't understand the need to mock her or shame her because she needs a nanny. Yes she should be more self sufficient but she's not. Some need more help than others and as long as she can afford the nanny whatever. She's lucky and her dh sounds wonderful you ask me. Sure I would be annoyed that she is asking me to go out of my way but all I have to do is say yes or no. And wish that I had her dh lol.

And I would not come get her kid either then. Why should I do more work when I don't even have a nanny?

Then don't. I might if I wanted the kid there. It depends on how annoyed I am that day. I raised my kids more or less alone but if I could have afforded a housekeeper or nanny I might have had one. I wanted a house husband. Hell most nights I come home thinking I'll do anyone who brings me a decent dinner and dessert right now. Yds can get away with nearly anything lol all he has to do is bake me something. I mean this woman would annoy me but who wouldn't be her if they could? At least have the means to do it if they wished?

[Fullxbusymom]

We are currently having a winter storm and ODS is having a friend sleep over. I decided I wanted the boys TIRED, so I took them to an indoor sports place earlier and invited another friend of theirs. Other friend’s mom said “I wish I could take them but DH is traveling and I’m juggling the kids schedules on my own and my nanny has the long weekend off. Can you pick him up?” I didn’t have the heart / guts to tell her that my DH is also away on business lol.

ETA - Geez ladies, you’re a pretty hostile bunch. This was meant to be an eye roll post, not a bitchy “I’m a perfect mom” bash. She always has trouble managing without help, which is fine because normally she has help. Our boys do a lot of the same activities, so we actually trade off transportation when her nanny is around. When her nanny is not around I often just do it because I know she gets completely overwhelmed.

And yes, I’m jealous of all her help lol. I’m also jealous that she’s rail thin and is incredibly wealthy! That doesn’t prevent us from being friends.

Oh lord that lady wouldn't be able to function with my schedule then. 4 kids, 2 jobs, single mom and I jockey all their activities and outings by myself. No nanny and zero help. I see exactly why you wanted to laugh.

[Pjmm]

yes but people should probably have some shame about their lack of self sufficiency or at least not be pissy when someone mocks them for it. I cannot imagine having a nanny and still not being able to function alone with my kids. Lord.

I don't understand the need to mock her or shame her because she needs a nanny. Yes she should be more self sufficient but she's not. Some need more help than others and as long as she can afford the nanny whatever. She's lucky and her dh sounds wonderful you ask me. Sure I would be annoyed that she is asking me to go out of my way but all I have to do is say yes or no. And wish that I had her dh lol.

Hell, I can do everything myself no problem, but I'd love a nanny some days and my kids are tweens.

It's cooking for me that's really getting old.

[Nopeville]

I don't understand the need to mock her or shame her because she needs a nanny. Yes she should be more self sufficient but she's not. Some need more help than others and as long as she can afford the nanny whatever. She's lucky and her dh sounds wonderful you ask me. Sure I would be annoyed that she is asking me to go out of my way but all I have to do is say yes or no. And wish that I had her dh lol.

Hell, I can do everything myself no problem, but I'd love a nanny some days and my kids are tweens.

It's cooking for me that's really getting old.
2rls4i.jpg

I totally get that. And, they want to eat every freaking day! By the time I get dinner cleaned up, I have to start planning for the next night. *sigh*

[Olioxenfree]

You don't deserve to call yourself her friend.