Here's my story sorry its long Any Advice?

[JD80]

I grew up with abuse.
I would never consider going back to someone like you've described.
You seem disappointed with the responses.
Were you hoping everyone would say this is a wonderful idea?

No, not really. Just disappointed in the 'Here's my advice with a side of snark". I was hoping maybe someone who has gone back to a broken relationship may give some advice. Or someone who never went back and has their own story to tell. I do believe people can change. Doesn't mean he has. I know I have.

[MrsDavidB]

He had an affair for 2 years and then moved a woman and her kids in. How can you ever forgive that or get over it? I couldn't.

[JD80]

I dont think someone like that is capable of real change.
You sound pretty badass though.

Whatever you choose I wish you all the best.

I'm no badass. Just not young and naive anymore.

Thank you

[Anonymom*23/6/364]

I grew up with abuse.
I would never consider going back to someone like you've described.
You seem disappointed with the responses.
Were you hoping everyone would say this is a wonderful idea?

No, not really. Just disappointed in the 'Here's my advice with a side of snark". I was hoping maybe someone who has gone back to a broken relationship may give some advice. Or someone who never went back and has their own story to tell. I do believe people can change. Doesn't mean he has. I know I have.

If he is a narcissist, he has not changed. Think of what this will do your kids.
Good luck with whatever you decide.

[JD80]

He had an affair for 2 years and then moved a woman and her kids in. How can you ever forgive that or get over it? I couldn't.

That's why I had to leave. But it hurt. Bad. I didn't want to. I knew if I stayed I could no longer respect myself and I knew he didn't respect me.
But I never stopped loving him. I moved hundreds of miles away because the last time I left he followed and harassed me until I gave in.
He claims he's changed. That he would do anything for us. I know thats what they all say...but he's never said that to me before. idk

[CotterpinDoozer]

I'm not trying to be discouraging, but there is a very good chance he's playing you again. If he truly is a narcissist then chances are he wants you back because he never expected to lose you in the first place. He expected to be able to keep fooling around and you'd stay. That's how narcissists operate, they play as they've changed, they are so sorry, and that it was a big mistake on their part. More times than not, however, they have not changed, they just don't like to feel like someone saw through them and their mind games. Personally, I'd not move back to him, he could come to visit, but I wouldn't let him suck me back into his games.

Good luck to you.

[JD80]

I grew up with abuse.
I would never consider going back to someone like you've described.
You seem disappointed with the responses.
Were you hoping everyone would say this is a wonderful idea?

No, not really. Just disappointed in the 'Here's my advice with a side of snark". I was hoping maybe someone who has gone back to a broken relationship may give some advice. Or someone who never went back and has their own story to tell. I do believe people can change. Doesn't mean he has. I know I have.

If he is a narcissist, he has not changed. Think of what this will do your kids.
Good luck with whatever you decide.

Thank you. btw you're siggy made me laugh!

[Sassy762]

I would never go back to that situation. Do you think that you miss " the person he was before the cheating started" OR do you just miss all of the drama? He is giving you the attention that you wanted and needed before but never received because your asshole cheating dh was too busy F***ing every Mary, Jane and Susan he came across.

[Midnight_Storm]

Before I give my thoughts I have 1 question. Has he been in therapy regularly and consistently for at least the past year and a half?

[Anonymom*23/6/364]

No, not really. Just disappointed in the 'Here's my advice with a side of snark". I was hoping maybe someone who has gone back to a broken relationship may give some advice. Or someone who never went back and has their own story to tell. I do believe people can change. Doesn't mean he has. I know I have.

If he is a narcissist, he has not changed. Think of what this will do your kids.
Good luck with whatever you decide.

Thank you. btw you're siggy made me laugh!

You're most welcome and good!