Thanksgiving is ruined

Anonymous 8

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LostTheSlipper wrote: Sun Nov 27, 2022 12:39 pm
Anonymous 8 wrote: Sat Nov 26, 2022 12:01 pm I have read all of this and taking into account your previous posts I can't help but be totally confused by your way of thinking. It's baffling! You're all over the place. One minute you say you don't ever resort to violence with your kids but I'm almost positive I've read about you hitting them before and the next you're beating them with a belt? You say you can't work because your near adult children need you to sit at home yet you expect them to be independent adults? Your dd antagonizes your ds all of the time and yet you not only allow it you reward her when your ds snaps and can't handle it anymore.
I really hope your ds decides to go to therapy soon. He's going to need it to recover from your parenting. At least your dd is getting that.
I mean you told your dd she should have given him the bag of snacks because she knows how he is with food? Nope nope nope you teach your ds not to be that way with food and to have some respect for other people.
I say this as a parent of an autistic kid. I know what I'm talking about when I say parenting an autistic kid is a ton of work. Getting them to see and understand the needs of others and that life requires give and take not just "well he's autistic you have to understand" is so much work but so vital for these kids to succeed in life. My kid used to be that way about food too. He would panic that our house would burn down or there would be a flood and he wouldn't have food. He would hide it in his room to rot (always produce of course) out of fear that something would happen to the kitchen and he wouldn't be able to eat. He has never gone hungry but he still did it. And it took me years to get him to let that go. But your solution is never to teach. It's to ignore until it blows up in your face and then implement some illogical giant consequence that you never actually follow through with and usually puts 1 kid against the other. 1 kid is suddenly the golden child and the other is dirt.
You also never have money for important things like a hotel when you move but you do for a $500 video game system and ridiculously expensive furniture. No wonder your kids are confused.
I think when people hit their kids they're either so angry they later cant remember doing it or in denial. My mom got mad at my brother for telling his gf that mom beat us (that's the phrase mom used). Bro tends to lie a lot so I'm not sure the extent of what he said, but mom said, "I never beat you kids!" I said, "Well mom, you did hit us with the paddle all the time." Her reply was, "I'd hit you kids once and then that was it. Then you'd be good again." ...Totally not true. She'd wale on us with that thing - and I told her so. She brushed it off, "well, it's not like he was saying!" She honestly either doesn't remember because she was so caught up in the anger of the moment, or is in denial, or both.
That's totally possible. I just hope her kids break the cycle and aren't toxic parents. I had to break that cycle and I know how hard that is but someone has to do it. My dad would reach for his belt for the smallest infractions and I just refuse to do that with my children.
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