Valentina327 wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:20 pmI agree with you 1000%. There are plenty of times that you meet a kids parents and you know exactly why they are a bully and why it goes unchecked. Big asswipes raise little asswipes Teaching children not to be bullies is supposed to happen at home. Not every parent is responsible.AnnieArk wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 4:07 pmValentina327 wrote: ↑Tue Oct 15, 2019 12:24 pm
Hey Annie -
I think we're a little too liberal about what constitutes bullying these days. This sounds more like simple mocking - kids just being rotten as they've always been. Kids are mean, and they'll look for a reason to make fun of anyone. My opinion is that everyone is far too dramatic now.
We've all been made fun of in school. It prepares us for adulthood, when we're forced to deal with people we don't like or who don't like us. It's part of learning to cope. It sucks at the time, but it helps form strategies of how to deal.
If they were cornering him in a group and screaming in his face, if they were pantsing him in the hall over it, if he was scared to go to school, that would be bullying. That's something I'd definitely be marching to school over immediately. I didn't get the impression from the OP that anything like that was happening though.
The way you combat a bully is by growing a thicker skin and getting quick with the return insults. That shuts bullies down. They do it to get a rise. Take away the reaction, you take away the bully. So either way - just rotten kids or true bullies - the antidote is the same.
No, ignoring them doesn't shut bullies down. They often escalate in an attempt to get that reaction. Constant mocking IS bullying. It is harassment. It's not okay. It's not kids being kids. It's unacceptable. It causes emotional damage that can be lifelong.
Instead of telling kids to toughen up, we need to teach bullies that it's not acceptable and will not be tolerated. That's preparation for the adult world. Adults who bully coworkers are fired. Many adult bullies are sitting in prison.
Unfortunately, we can't crawl into people's homes and force them to teach their children not to be jerks. If only we could, this would be a much different world.
What we do have jurisdiction over, however, are the things that happen in our own little pod. Kids need to be taught self confidence, to stand up for themselves, and not take crap from others. They need to be taught how to manage the bullies of the world.
We run into those types of people all of our lives unfortunately.
Children should be helped to learn coping skills. That doesn't change the fact that there should be zero tolerance for bullying whether it's physical or verbal. Schools should come down hard on bullies. Those schools that don't are failing their students.