Would it be wrong? (kids and money)

[Anonymous 5]

I don't know. Maybe because judging people you don't know makes you feel better about yourself? Maybe because there are a lot of jerks out there? Could be lots of things.

It's on my 8 year old's Christmas list. It's not like I want it as much as he does. I hadn't played it in months, he played it every chance he got.

Why I am getting the distinct feeling that since you can't afford to replace a system that you enjoy playing, you're trying to justify making your KIDS pay for it?

I have 2 kids, I owe them each about $120 in allowance, and they also have about $300 saved up between the two of them. Would it be flat out wrong to ask them to put money towards a new video game system for the whole family? We had one until recently but it needs replaced.

They're 8 & 10.

He shouldn't have to pay for something on his Christmas list. Don't be so worried that they might be spoiled that you go too far the other direction.

It doesn't matter if you gave them some or all of the money. Once you give something to someone it's theirs. To feel you have the right to ask for something because you gave it to them is disrespectful to your children.

As to them losing their money on a trip , things like that happen to everyone, including adults. You owe them money. Show your children your word is to be trusted. Pay them the money you owe them.

[Inmybizz]

You are borrowing against their allowance? I would give them their allowance and buy the game system myself.

[Anonymous 1]

Oh he's not paying for his Christmas presents! But he's also not getting a system as a Christmas gift because that's something that we would share as a family, and Christmas gifts are personal possessions (in our house).

They didn't lose their money on the trip though, they didn't get their allowance while they were away for obvious reasons and when they got back I told them to get their wallets so they could have their allowance (as always). But they "couldn't find them", so they didn't get their allowance. They weren't lost, they were barely even misplaced, my kids were just being lazy. They've found them now so I just have to pop out to the ATM for some more cash.

I don't know. Maybe because judging people you don't know makes you feel better about yourself? Maybe because there are a lot of jerks out there? Could be lots of things.

It's on my 8 year old's Christmas list. It's not like I want it as much as he does. I hadn't played it in months, he played it every chance he got.

Why I am getting the distinct feeling that since you can't afford to replace a system that you enjoy playing, you're trying to justify making your KIDS pay for it?

He shouldn't have to pay for something on his Christmas list. Don't be so worried that they might be spoiled that you go too far the other direction.

It doesn't matter if you gave them some or all of the money. Once you give something to someone it's theirs. To feel you have the right to ask for something because you gave it to them is disrespectful to your children.

As to them losing their money on a trip , things like that happen to everyone, including adults. You owe them money. Show your children your word is to be trusted. Pay them the money you owe them.

[Anonymous 8]

I would not

[Anonymous 3]

Only if the old system was broken and they were begging for a new one would I consider asking them to kick in towards the cost of a new one.

If I were going to ask the kids to kick in towards the cost of a new system, I would ask each kid to kick in $87.50 (1/4 of the cost of the new system). Since the adults are using the system, it's only fair that they also kick in towards the cost of it. But honestly, I don't even think I'd have them kick in at all.

If you celebrate Christmas, make the new system the FAMILY Christmas present. I would not be spending any amount on any toy this close to Christmas. If they want specific games for that new system, have them save their money and pay for those.

The system & 2 controllers would be about $350. That's without any games, those run anywhere from around $20-50.

It would be wrong.

You should be encouraging them to save their money. You shouldn't be giving them ideas of how to spend it.

You probably already mentioned this. But how much will this new system cost?

8 year old plays the most, then 10 year old, then me & DH

[Anonymous 1]

I haven't borrowed anything, they were away from home and then "couldn't find" (didn't look for) their wallets so I've been holding their allowance for several weeks. The rule is always that they bring their wallet to me to get their allowance. They've both found them now.

You are borrowing against their allowance? I would give them their allowance and buy the game system myself.

[Anonymous 1]

The old system was actually stolen, so they've lost all of their games too. One minute they're begging for a replacement but the next they seem to have forgotten about it. Fickle little things, lol

Only if the old system was broken and they were begging for a new one would I consider asking them to kick in towards the cost of a new one.

If I were going to ask the kids to kick in towards the cost of a new system, I would ask each kid to kick in $87.50 (1/4 of the cost of the new system). Since the adults are using the system, it's only fair that they also kick in towards the cost of it. But honestly, I don't even think I'd have them kick in at all.

If you celebrate Christmas, make the new system the FAMILY Christmas present. I would not be spending any amount on any toy this close to Christmas. If they want specific games for that new system, have them save their money and pay for those.

The system & 2 controllers would be about $350. That's without any games, those run anywhere from around $20-50.

It would be wrong.

You should be encouraging them to save their money. You shouldn't be giving them ideas of how to spend it.

You probably already mentioned this. But how much will this new system cost?

[Anonymous 3]

Don't get me wrong. I don't think that you are off base to ask your kids to kick in towards expensive items that they want. I just think it would be more fair that all family members chip in towards the purchase of it. Regardless of how much money any member has saved, each member should be expected to chip in the same amount.

Now that I know that at least one of the kids has the system on his Christmas list, I would definitely just make this system a FAMILY CHRISTMAS GIFT. And if they want games for it, have them pay for those.

They aren't expected to purchase anything. I was just throwing around the idea of having them put their money towards it since it's something they both want, and there isn't really anything else they have their eye on that they aren't getting for Christmas.

If the gaming system would not be considered the child's personal possession, why would the child be expected to purchase it?

Well it's not like they could afford one on their own, and anyway that's just not the way we do things in our family. They have plenty of their own items but something like a gaming system isn't a personal possession in my opinion. At least not at their ages.

Also it's only THEIR money because we give it to them. Lol... I'm still undecided though, going to talk it over with DH too of course but just looking for some perspective.

[Valentina327]

I'm on the fence. Allowance is a gift IMHO. Some of us grew up without an allowance and didn't melt. If this is something that they want for their own recreation, I don't see it being wrong for you to tell them you can credit that $120 you "owe" them toward the system purchase. Allowance isn't "owed" in my mind. It's a courtesy that some parents afford their children. Isn't the intent of an allowance so that they have money to spend on something that they want? Little treats?

Probably an unpopular opinion but I think allowance is just a nicety.

[Anonymous 3]

Oh, no! The game system was stolen right out of your house???? That's terrible.

The old system was actually stolen, so they've lost all of their games too. One minute they're begging for a replacement but the next they seem to have forgotten about it. Fickle little things, lol

Only if the old system was broken and they were begging for a new one would I consider asking them to kick in towards the cost of a new one.

If I were going to ask the kids to kick in towards the cost of a new system, I would ask each kid to kick in $87.50 (1/4 of the cost of the new system). Since the adults are using the system, it's only fair that they also kick in towards the cost of it. But honestly, I don't even think I'd have them kick in at all.

If you celebrate Christmas, make the new system the FAMILY Christmas present. I would not be spending any amount on any toy this close to Christmas. If they want specific games for that new system, have them save their money and pay for those.

The system & 2 controllers would be about $350. That's without any games, those run anywhere from around $20-50.