That I can certainly understand
People are calling me petty and jealous because I dont want the other woman in my house
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The OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 3:32 pmWhy are her feelings petty? Should she feel different or be different because other people disagree?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 2:58 pm I think your decision and concerns are petty.
I think party guests that would share their uninvited opinion with their host are rude and uncouth.
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
Well not all of us are so enlightenedLiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pmThe OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 3:32 pmWhy are her feelings petty? Should she feel different or be different because other people disagree?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 2:58 pm I think your decision and concerns are petty.
I think party guests that would share their uninvited opinion with their host are rude and uncouth.
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
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LOL @ the dig, I am far from enlightened, BUT I do know that with effort, practice, meditation, & mindfulness, you or the OP can heal from betrayal, we all can.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:43 pmWell not all of us are so enlightenedLiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pmThe OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 3:32 pm
Why are her feelings petty? Should she feel different or be different because other people disagree?
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
So you would be shitty enough to invite someone your child doesn't want there?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pmThe OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 3:32 pmWhy are her feelings petty? Should she feel different or be different because other people disagree?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 2:58 pm I think your decision and concerns are petty.
I think party guests that would share their uninvited opinion with their host are rude and uncouth.
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
I think you are mistaking my whole point. If someone disrespects me they arent* invited to my house.
How long ago did you divorce your ex?
Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 6:20 pmSo you would be shitty enough to invite someone your child doesn't want there?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pmThe OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 3:32 pm
Why are her feelings petty? Should she feel different or be different because other people disagree?
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
I think you are mistaking my whole point. If someone disrespects me they are invited to my house.
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I wouldn't care one bit about the opinions of others. No woman who participates in an affair with my husband is coming in my house post-divorce for fear that I'll be called petty. Absolutely not.
About 7 years ago.Anonymous 6 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 6:31 pm How long ago did you divorce your ex?
Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 6:20 pmSo you would be shitty enough to invite someone your child doesn't want there?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pm
The OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
I think you are mistaking my whole point. If someone disrespects me they are invited to my house.
It wouldnt matter if this was in 20 or 50 years though she still wouldnt be invited to my house.
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I am far from perfect, I act petty plenty of times in my life too, but I simply feel this specific issue is petty. I am not mistaking, just being truthful.Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 6:20 pmSo you would be shitty enough to invite someone your child doesn't want there?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pmThe OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.Anonymous 7 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 3:32 pm
Why are her feelings petty? Should she feel different or be different because other people disagree?
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
I think you are mistaking my whole point. If someone disrespects me they arent* invited to my house.
We have completely different perspectives; if someone disrespects me, I work towards forgiveness, moving on, & letting go. I am trying to instill the same values in my children. Obviously that's a core value difference between us, so we can just accept to disagree.
You obviously have strong feelings about this issue and you know what is best for your family, so I wish you peace with your choice, and as I said I think your guests were rude to bring it up anyway.
It is a FACT that is fucked up to invite someone when the person you are celebrating doesnt want them there. Only a shitty person would do that. Why are you so shitty?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 7:07 pmI am far from perfect, I act petty plenty of times in my life too, but I simply feel this specific issue is petty. I am not mistaking, just being truthful.Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 6:20 pmSo you would be shitty enough to invite someone your child doesn't want there?LiveWhatULove wrote: ↑Mon Jun 24, 2019 5:42 pm
The OP can have any feelings, she needs to at the moment. She is welcome to harbor emotional baggage, just as I am free to suggest being mindful and letting it go is a better alternative.
I define petty as worrying about inconsequential things. In my opinion, the other woman, is inconsequential, even several minutes of concern over her presence is emotional clutter that I would not even entertain this far after the event. She's not worthy of a moment in my mind.
I would worry about my home, the food, my children, the number of guests, the safety of those coming, but unless I didn't have space or there was a risk of violence, I would not worry about her coming or not coming. She's nothing but another person who I passed on the road of life, not worthy of any emotional energy. So to me, remembering the anger and feelings in the moment of betrayal & letting them dictate future decisions is petty.
You and the OP are free to disagree.
I think you are mistaking my whole point. If someone disrespects me they arent* invited to my house.
We have completely different perspectives; if someone disrespects me, I work towards forgiveness, moving on, & letting go. I am trying to instill the same values in my children. Obviously that's a core value difference between us, so we can just accept to disagree.
You obviously have strong feelings about this issue and you know what is best for your family, so I wish you peace with your choice, and as I said I think your guests were rude to bring it up anyway.