Mother is hospital...she turns into a baby

Anonymous 1

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Every time my mother goes into the hospital she turns into a big ass attention seeking baby and it drives me up the wall. She's not the nicest person on the best day...so she's in the hospital because her cancer is giving her pain and she's blowing up my phone with demands...she wants this and that okay fine but she expects daily visits and I told her no...she even almost refused to go to the hospital because she said no one will visit her and I said so what we facetime everyday and we send messages on facebook messenger all day that should be enough. It's a pain in the ass to drive into manhattan ,pay $22 at a parking garage just to give her a snickers bar and listen to her rant for an hour meanwhile my kids are at home and im missing work/things i want to do.

Maybe i'd feel different if she didnt abuse me my whole life and left me with a ton of issues im still battling daily...Im still struggling last night i was in my car driving and crying because I seek validation from men because she always dismissed me growing up making me feel like absolute shit....now i don't wanna go above and beyond for her and baby her when I was never extended that same courtesy. My ex boyfriend beat the shit out of me and i was in the hospital and no one in my family came to check on me .She saw me some days later bruised up and didnt say a word...

Now im supposed to drop everything to run to your bedside and listen to you bitch about everything under the sun...

Im barely making it thru phone calls and facetimes because I want to throw the phone when i see her attention seeking face.
Anonymous 2

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It's totally understandable that you resent her wanting what she didn't give. Know this, though: This will all be over with sooner than later. Have a calm conversation with her and tell her that you will be there as often as you can be but that you won't tolerate her being nasty. Keep in mind that despite the fact that she was a jerk to you growing up, she is most definitely uncomfortable these days. Be as compassionate as you can be. Bring her a Snickers bar when you can. And just try to hold on to the moments when she IS kind. This too shall pass. I'm sorry for how she was to you when you were growing up. And I'm sorry for the burden that you are currently having to endure. It's OK to be mad at her. It's understandable that you are. Just hang in there and try to laugh between the Snickers exchanges. :)
Anonymous 1 wrote: Mon Aug 03, 2020 11:25 am Every time my mother goes into the hospital she turns into a big ass attention seeking baby and it drives me up the wall. She's not the nicest person on the best day...so she's in the hospital because her cancer is giving her pain and she's blowing up my phone with demands...she wants this and that okay fine but she expects daily visits and I told her no...she even almost refused to go to the hospital because she said no one will visit her and I said so what we facetime everyday and we send messages on facebook messenger all day that should be enough. It's a pain in the ass to drive into manhattan ,pay $22 at a parking garage just to give her a snickers bar and listen to her rant for an hour meanwhile my kids are at home and im missing work/things i want to do.

Maybe i'd feel different if she didnt abuse me my whole life and left me with a ton of issues im still battling daily...Im still struggling last night i was in my car driving and crying because I seek validation from men because she always dismissed me growing up making me feel like absolute shit....now i don't wanna go above and beyond for her and baby her when I was never extended that same courtesy. My ex boyfriend beat the shit out of me and i was in the hospital and no one in my family came to check on me .She saw me some days later bruised up and didnt say a word...

Now im supposed to drop everything to run to your bedside and listen to you bitch about everything under the sun...

Im barely making it thru phone calls and facetimes because I want to throw the phone when i see her attention seeking face.
californiagirl83
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CAN you even visit with COVID going on? No one could see me the last rime I went in (2 weeks ago).
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Anonymous 1 wrote: Mon Aug 03, 2020 11:25 am Every time my mother goes into the hospital she turns into a big ass attention seeking baby and it drives me up the wall. She's not the nicest person on the best day...so she's in the hospital because her cancer is giving her pain and she's blowing up my phone with demands...she wants this and that okay fine but she expects daily visits and I told her no...she even almost refused to go to the hospital because she said no one will visit her and I said so what we facetime everyday and we send messages on facebook messenger all day that should be enough. It's a pain in the ass to drive into manhattan ,pay $22 at a parking garage just to give her a snickers bar and listen to her rant for an hour meanwhile my kids are at home and im missing work/things i want to do.

Maybe i'd feel different if she didnt abuse me my whole life and left me with a ton of issues im still battling daily...Im still struggling last night i was in my car driving and crying because I seek validation from men because she always dismissed me growing up making me feel like absolute shit....now i don't wanna go above and beyond for her and baby her when I was never extended that same courtesy. My ex boyfriend beat the shit out of me and i was in the hospital and no one in my family came to check on me .She saw me some days later bruised up and didnt say a word...

Now im supposed to drop everything to run to your bedside and listen to you bitch about everything under the sun...

Im barely making it thru phone calls and facetimes because I want to throw the phone when i see her attention seeking face.
Why haven't you cut that abusive mother out of your life yet?
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californiagirl83 wrote: Mon Aug 03, 2020 12:45 pm CAN you even visit with COVID going on? No one could see me the last rime I went in (2 weeks ago).
One friend of mine was able to but another couldn't see his wife in rehab. So Idk about where op is but it might depend on the hospital. However if I was op I'd just say sorry someone at work tested positive for covid-19 so to be safe I'm quarantining...
Anonymous 3

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Good luck Kookoo
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mojogirl
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Hate to be the bearer of bad news but you got her victim mentality. The apple didn't fall far from the tree. You don't cut her out cause then you couldn't play the matyr card.
Anonymous 4

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Anonymous 1 wrote: Mon Aug 03, 2020 11:25 am Every time my mother goes into the hospital she turns into a big ass attention seeking baby and it drives me up the wall. She's not the nicest person on the best day...so she's in the hospital because her cancer is giving her pain and she's blowing up my phone with demands...she wants this and that okay fine but she expects daily visits and I told her no...she even almost refused to go to the hospital because she said no one will visit her and I said so what we facetime everyday and we send messages on facebook messenger all day that should be enough. It's a pain in the ass to drive into manhattan ,pay $22 at a parking garage just to give her a snickers bar and listen to her rant for an hour meanwhile my kids are at home and im missing work/things i want to do.

Maybe i'd feel different if she didnt abuse me my whole life and left me with a ton of issues im still battling daily...Im still struggling last night i was in my car driving and crying because I seek validation from men because she always dismissed me growing up making me feel like absolute shit....now i don't wanna go above and beyond for her and baby her when I was never extended that same courtesy. My ex boyfriend beat the shit out of me and i was in the hospital and no one in my family came to check on me .She saw me some days later bruised up and didnt say a word...

Now im supposed to drop everything to run to your bedside and listen to you bitch about everything under the sun...

Im barely making it thru phone calls and facetimes because I want to throw the phone when i see her attention seeking face.
KooKoo cut ties.
Anonymous 1

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I should've updated yesterday but...I didnt visit her yesterday and she went on a rampage of anger.My brother called me cursing me out saying im evil for not visiting. I had to meet with my landlord yesterday...I just moved in here and she had window guys here I wasnt leaving my new place while she roamed and did whatever she didn't leave until 4:30 ....it takes an hour to drive into manhattan from brooklyn and visiting hours was over at 6:30 so I stayed home.I was not in the mood to drive into manhattan and deal with her whining.I have my own problems.

So because I didnt visit she was angry and demanded to leave the hospital saying she can get out patient treatment and stay at my house and I can just drive her to treatment everyday.

The nerve of this ***** ....I just moved in here ,my bedroom set isnt in yet and im sleeping in my son's bed while my daughter and him share a bed so I told her no she can't stay here there's nowhere for her to sleep.I dont even have a sofa!My sofa isn't being delivered until next week so she sent me a long rant cursing me out saying im this and that....and what made her think she can volunteer my damn time and energy into driving her for treatment everyday?As if I have absolutely nothing else going on?

So now no one is speaking to me....

Apparently im selfish and evil ....
Anonymous 1

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mojogirl wrote: Mon Aug 03, 2020 7:23 pm Hate to be the bearer of bad news but you got her victim mentality. The apple didn't fall far from the tree. You don't cut her out cause then you couldn't play the matyr card.
I didnt cut her out because she has cancer and we lost 3 family members this past year..our family has dwindled down to almost nothing.Im sticking around because her cancer is terminal and I dont want to feel guilty if something happens.
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