Would you drop this friend?

Anonymous 4

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If you're going to be upset when she doesn't do things for free, stop asking her to do things.
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stilltfez
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she is who she is, now that you know who she is, stop expecting that she might reciprocate and adjust your giving (time, acts, $) appropriately and stop asking her to assist.
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agander2017
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I personally wouldn't stop being her friend, but I would stop giving her free things. I would stop babysitting for free. It sounds like she isn't giving back all that she is taking. When she asked for gas, I would have told her to take it out of what she owes us for babysitting.

I would be really annoyed if I paid her to get me things, and she didn't. That right there would have made me stop doing anything for her, or helping her without payment. That's not okay. Have you guys tried talking to her about this? Maybe that's the first step you should take with this whole thing. Tell her you feel like she's taking advantage of your friendship.
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Inmybizz
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Stop asking her to do things. Stop buying her things.

If you want to continue asking her to do things be okay with knowing you will have to pay.
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Ladyiq
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Read the room! Your friend cannot financially do for you what you do for her. Obviously she isnt baking cakes just for the fun of it. She pulled into the gas station because she needed it. How close are you really that you havent figured that out. If friendship is transactional to you then drop her but if friendship means more than to you then that change your expectations. Stop keeping score!
Anonymous 4

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This.
Ladyiq wrote: Wed Jul 08, 2020 9:15 am Read the room! Your friend cannot financially do for you what you do for her. Obviously she isnt baking cakes just for the fun of it. She pulled into the gas station because she needed it. How close are you really that you havent figured that out. If friendship is transactional to you then drop her but if friendship means more than to you then that change your expectations. Stop keeping score!
Anonymous 5

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I would stop buying her things and I would charge her when she asked for something.
Anonymous 6

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Anonymous 1 wrote: Tue Jul 07, 2020 10:19 am My very best friend and I have another friend who we often hang out with. I will refer to my best friend as VBF and the other friend as OF.

VBF and I are constantly doing things for each other and also for OF. Like, if I am out and see something I know VBF or OF need, I will grab it. VBF does the same. We won't ask for money unless it is a more expensive item. VBF and I make all kinds of different shirts, tumblers, keychains, magnets, and other items. If we make something for each other or OF, the most we ever charge is materials. OF makes cakes. She always wants full price for her cakes no matter what.

OF has young children. ABF and I often watch her children, or our older children will watch her children for free. (Because that is what friends do) However, I needed a ride one day to pick up my car. VBF was working. OF came to get me, then pulled into a gas station and looked at me expectantly. She lives literally 5 miles from my house and the dealership is about 10 miles away from my house...but about 5 away from hers.

VBF and I were talking about it and there have been a lot of these types of situations between OF and us. A few months ago, OF and her entire family were down with a stomach flu. I was out of town. VBF asked OF if she could drop off some gatorade and a few other essenatials. She sent her money on Venmo. OF spent about half of it, didn't even get what was asked for, and kept the rest of the money.

I feel it is time to distance ourselves from her. I'm over it. I feel she takes advantage of our friendship.
I would have dropped her a long time ago. She's an entitled mooch
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famousglm714
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I think my small group of friends would distance ourselves. We’re like you. She’s being kind of petty with money and when it’s small amounts like that, that’s annoying.
Anonymous 7

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I wouldn’t stop being friends with her but I would stop babysitting for free and doing anything else for her for free. I’m not a tit for tat person but it sounds like she’s taking advantage of you.
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