Her mom spanked our 2 year old.

Mamaof5
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And it irks me. My kids and my MIL were outside catching fireflies. My 2 year old ran in the road and MIL spanked him for it. She said she knew she probably didn’t have our permission for it, but it’s what she did with all of her kids and they never ran in the street again. I don’t agree with spanking. My wife agrees with it for life and death situations but in 10 years of parenting we haven’t had a situation where she’s felt it’s necessary. It was one swat over a diaper. Logically I know it won’t hurt him and he won’t remember. But it bothers me and I feel she crossed a line because she knew I wouldn’t agree with it. I’m not super mad, just irritated and needed to vent
californiagirl83
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Well, you need to get onto the same page as your wife, because that definitely could have resulted in a life or death situation. Its ok you don't like spanking. You two just need to agree what transgression gets what punishment.
Anonymous 1

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My dd was spanked for running in the street as a toddler.

I'm not big on spankings but when a child is putting themself in harms way I think a spanking to make sure the message gets through is acceptable.

It's okay to be bothered by it, but like you said, your child will be fine.
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That's an old school method of parenting that while I honestly never experienced it, I had friends who did and to the best of my knowledge, they were fine and didn't feel abused once they recalled it as adults later in life.

However, your voice matters in this OP, and how you feel about this sort of thing.

As another has suggested, definitely get to a point of agreement to even compromise with your wife about this type of discipline or scare tactic (hate using those last two words, but couldn't come up with something better).
Anonymous 2

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I think you really needs to get over it. So just because YOU don't like it means your partners feelings on it go it the window? She's ok with spanking in situations like and that's exactly what her mother did, stood behind and did what her dd would have done. Obviously in 10 years your mil has never felt the need to do this either. This situation warranted a pop on butt and a firm "we do not run in the street. It's dangerous"
Anonymous 3

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I think the most important thing that you learned out of this situation is that you and your wife aren't on the same page regarding how to discipline your child. I'd sit down with her and discuss this further so that you both are. That said, the one swat on the butt didn't hurt the child and he'll most definitely not run out into the street again.,
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agander2017
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I'm sorry, but that was a life or death situation. It scared her. Think about what could have happened. I think a smack on the butt in this case, was not a bad thing. Your child needs to know they can't run into the street. If they have never been spanked, then they will think twice before they run into the road again. A 2 year old can be taught not to do things.
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Linda_Runs
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I will start by saying that nobody spanks my children! I am not against spanking under certain circumstances and have done it, but that is my choice. Also, a single smack on the bum is not a spanking; it is just a smack, but nobody does that either to my children.

Mamaof4, I hear your vent and irritation. In the future just make your feelings on the subject know to whomever is looking after any of your children.
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stilltfez
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how would you have addressed your child running into the road?

(I refuse to address the smack to the tushy as you and your wife are not in agreement and our opinions do not matter)
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Frau Holle
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That was probably for the best.

At that age logic isn’t formed yet and their brains need associations.

Running into the road = pain.

It’s better to learn that lesson with a swat to the butt than a Chevy to the head.
“ I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night “ - Sarah Williams
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