I am not paying BM child support

[Anonymous 1]

DH lost his job a few months back. I have taken over paying all of our household bills. He is actively looking for a job and has had several interviews and a few second interviews. He is over qualified for most of the jobs and people are seeming to have a problem with that. There are no jobs at the level he has been working at for years just below.

The one thing I won't pay for is child support. I think it is BS that it has to be paid in the first place and BM doesn't use it towards the kids anyway. They have equal custody. It is more than what DH is getting in unemployment and he has had to use some of his savings. He doesn't want to do that and just wants me to pay. I told him no. That he can at least figure out a way to pay this one thing. I'm not going to give my hard earned money to BM for her to spend on herself. DH should honestly take it to court and get it dropped if he can especially because his unemployment is a lot less than what he was making.

[Bubbs]

How do you know she doesn't use it towards the kids?
Do the kids have a home, lights, gas etc?
Then it is going towards the kids.
They have clothes and shoes and haircuts?

[Anonymous 1]

How do you know she doesn't use it towards the kids?
Do the kids have a home, lights, gas etc?
Then it is going towards the kids.
They have clothes and shoes and haircuts?

Her boyfriend pays all the bills. She brags about it all the time. She doesn't even buy the kids clothes or hair cuts or anything like that.

[Bubbs]

How do you know she doesn't use it towards the kids?
Do the kids have a home, lights, gas etc?
Then it is going towards the kids.
They have clothes and shoes and haircuts?

Her boyfriend pays all the bills. She brags about it all the time. She doesn't even buy the kids clothes or hair cuts or anything like that.

She's probably not putting all of the money into the bank. If they live together, it is all considered household money.
The court doesn't ask for a record of what child support is spent on, he shouldn't just not pay for his children, because you view one parent as not doing their part. Then where would the kids be?

[MrsDavidB]

1-yes he should file a modification in court if his circumstances have changed drastically.

2- Stop being a BM detective. You have no idea what she is spending the support on.

[Anonymous 1]

How do you know she doesn't use it towards the kids?
Do the kids have a home, lights, gas etc?
Then it is going towards the kids.
They have clothes and shoes and haircuts?

Her boyfriend pays all the bills. She brags about it all the time. She doesn't even buy the kids clothes or hair cuts or anything like that.

She's probably not putting all of the money into the bank. If they live together, it is all considered household money.
The court doesn't ask for a record of what child support is spent on, he shouldn't just not pay for his children, because you view one parent as not doing their part. Then where would the kids be?

I know the court doesn't ask what it is spent on but they should to at least make sure the money is going towards the kids. He is still paying it. If he stopped paying child support the kids would have the same life because we would still be paying for everything for them anyway.

[Deleted User 1393]

that's nice

[Rebeccaraev2]

You don’t want him to end up in arrears by not paying.

[Anonymous 1]

1-yes he should file a modification in court if his circumstances have changed drastically.

2- Stop being a BM detective. You have no idea what she is spending the support on.

I know she doesn't buy things for the kids and that she doesn't pay bills. She has bragged about what the money has gone to. Buying a motorcycle (which the kids don't use), vacations the kids don't go on, her hair nails and make up.

[Anonymous 1]

You don’t want him to end up in arrears by not paying.

He won't.