Momto2boys973 wrote: ↑Sat Oct 05, 2019 10:35 pm
I agree. I, for example, think that gender reveal parties are dumb, but if someone I cared about invited me to one I would go and celebrate with them, because while it may seem dumb to me, it’s a happy and special occasion for them.
I am not a troll. Not wanting to go to a wedding doesnt make me a troll.
Well, if this isn't a troll and you are for real, it does make you inconsiderate. If you love someone, what's important to them is important to you. She didn't believe in staying in a marriage she wasn't completely happy in. I would think as a good sister you would applaud her not settling. She may think less of you for remaining in your relationship, which I am assuming is long term based on your criticism of her being married twice. I don't blame her or your mother for being upset. I honestly wouldn't bother with you much anymore if you intentionally disrespected me like that. We reap what we sow in this life and you are sowing discord.
Exactly. My philosophy in life is to seize any opportunity possible to celebrate. Life is short and throws us curveballs without warning, so I think we should make merry whenever we can!
Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Sat Oct 05, 2019 9:48 pm
I went to the first two and they were both a waste of time and money. I am not doing it again. She says this is "the one" but she thought that the first two times. I am not taking time off work, I am not buying a plane ticket, and I am not sitting through another boring ceremony.
She says I am being selfish for not going. Oh well it might be selfish but expecting people to come to a third wedding is also selfish.
She said I should not expect anything from her anymore. I dont know what she means besides random christmas cards and gifts here and there. I am not going to miss that too much.
My mom is mad at me also but they will both have to get over it.
Sorry, I have never had a friend or relative get married 3 times. I can only think of one person who married twice, even. I am not sure how I would feel, I would probably go. But your sister is mean, threatening you like that
I can see the OP’s viewpoint although it is not appropriately or maturely expressed. It is hard to get excited about someone’s 3rd wedding especially since it requires significant travel costs and time off work. But the OP should have kept her opinion to herself and go to the wedding. Use it as an opportunity to visit with family and maybe even tack on a short side trip/vacation.
My SIL got engaged last year for the 5th time (only one actual marriage ending in divorce about 10 years ago). She sent out a Save the Date email in May for May 2020. While the date was fine with our family, neither my DH (her brother) and I were going to book a hotel yet because of her track record. Well a day later, we get another email saying the date needed to be changed. I already knew it conflicted with my nephew’s college graduation. And she asked for other conflicts so she can plan around them. Well here it is October and we still don’t have a date. Her sister told me about a conversation she had with the bride to be about how put out she was because no one was expressing unbridled enthusiasm for the wedding. Was told by her sister to just plan it and whomever can make it will. Even suggested eloping and getting married on an upcoming vacation since she was already planning a trip for her 50th birthday. I guess that didn’t sit well. I suspect she wants a do-over wedding because the first one was a bit of a shot gun wedding. Regardless, if she has a wedding, we will go and cross our fingers that this one works out.
Depending on who’s party is it. My brother? Absolutely. I would do what I can. A friend I haven’t seen in years? Probably not.
And if it wasn’t possible for me to attend because of work or money or because we’re not that close and I find it dumb, then that’s out of my hands. I would explain why I can’t go, but I wouldn’t be an ass about it saying it’s because their party is dumb. I would express regret that’s i can’t be there, offer congratulations and send a gift.
Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Sat Oct 05, 2019 10:40 pm
Would you take off work, fly out, get a hotel, buy an outfit, etc to attend a gender reveal party?
Momto2boys973 wrote: ↑Sat Oct 05, 2019 10:35 pm
I agree. I, for example, think that gender reveal parties are dumb, but if someone I cared about invited me to one I would go and celebrate with them, because while it may seem dumb to me, it’s a happy and special occasion for them.
Well, if this isn't a troll and you are for real, it does make you inconsiderate. If you love someone, what's important to them is important to you. She didn't believe in staying in a marriage she wasn't completely happy in. I would think as a good sister you would applaud her not settling. She may think less of you for remaining in your relationship, which I am assuming is long term based on your criticism of her being married twice. I don't blame her or your mother for being upset. I honestly wouldn't bother with you much anymore if you intentionally disrespected me like that. We reap what we sow in this life and you are sowing discord.
I politely declined. I didnt say one rude thing to her at all. She is the only one who has been rude.
Momto2boys973 wrote: ↑Sun Oct 06, 2019 9:57 am
Depending on who’s party is it. My brother? Absolutely. I would do what I can. A friend I haven’t seen in years? Probably not.
And if it wasn’t possible for me to attend because of work or money or because we’re not that close and I find it dumb, then that’s out of my hands. I would explain why I can’t go, but I wouldn’t be an ass about it saying it’s because their party is dumb. I would express regret that’s i can’t be there, offer congratulations and send a gift.
Anonymous 1 wrote: ↑Sat Oct 05, 2019 10:40 pm
Would you take off work, fly out, get a hotel, buy an outfit, etc to attend a gender reveal party?
Momto2boys973 wrote: ↑Sat Oct 05, 2019 10:35 pm
I agree. I, for example, think that gender reveal parties are dumb, but if someone I cared about invited me to one I would go and celebrate with them, because while it may seem dumb to me, it’s a happy and special occasion for them.
I didn't go to my sister's second wedding. I could have made it if I really wanted to but she's a bitch and I don't get along with her. Not to mention it was 4 days before school started for my kids, which gave me a convenient excuse as to why I could not attend.
Third marriage + requiring me to fly to the ceremony + a not-so-strong relationship with bride or groom= “Sorry that I’m unable to attend” and a “congratulations” wedding card.
עמ׳ ישראל חי 
