People are calling me petty and jealous because I dont want the other woman in my house

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My ex and I divorced many years after I caught him cheating. We coparented pretty well. We werent perfect and we both make mistakes but overall I think we did good given the circumstances.

I am civil with the mistress who is now his wife. It took awhile but I am polite to her.

My oldest just graduated and I threw a big graduation party. My ex asked if he can come and I said sure. He asked if his wife can come and I told him no. I dont want her in my house. She disrespected me in a fundamental way. She was my friend before all of it happened. I am not saying it is just her that was wrong, my ex was more in the wrong BUT he is the father of my kids and that is what makes it different.

A lot of his family was going to be there. He was not going to have his own graduation party.

Everything was fine at the party but after some people were talking shit about me about how I was just petty and jealous. I guess it might be seen as petty but that doesnt mean I am jealous. Years ago sure I can admit I was but things turned out for the best for me. I have an amazing husband.

I dont like having people who have disrespected me in my own home. It is one thing when it is the father of my children and it is a big day for them. That I can deal with but it doesnt mean I want his wife there. She burned bridges all those years ago. I burned the bridge that was my marriage to my ex but because we are parenting together I can never completely burn that bridge

I just wanted to vent.

Eta my kids are not close with their SM and DS did not want her there
Momto2boys973
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While I can understand that you’re still feeling hurt for what you did, don’t pretend you’re civil and polite to her if you invite her husband but not her to a party. Just admit that you’re still not in a place where you can actually put that behind you to be civil. It’s perfectly understandable.
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Anonymous 1

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Momto2boys973 wrote: Mon Jun 24, 2019 12:50 am While I can understand that you’re still feeling hurt for what you did, don’t pretend you’re civil and polite to her if you invite her husband but not her to a party. Just admit that you’re still not in a place where you can actually put that behind you to be civil.
Well I didnt invite him. He asked if he could come and I said okay. I wouldnt have just invited him

That doesnt mean I am not polite and civil when we run into each other or if we are at events together. I dont feel hurt anymore, it was a long time ago. It is a respect thing
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AllofFive19
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I'm sorry they're treating you like that.
“Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today.” – Will Rogers
Anonymous 2

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Time to cut out the.jerks that were calling you petty and jealous after the party. I would not tolerate that or the 2nd wife in my house, ever
cellomom26
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I don't blame you.

She must be crazy to marry a man who cheated on his wife. He will likely do the same to her.
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Valentina327
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They can yap all they want. You are perfectly within your rights to have the feelings you have on the matter. I'd make my presence scarce around those that were critics too. Hope your party was a success! :)
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Anonymous 3

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That's it, cut out anyone who you feel disrespected you.
Pjmm
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I will be in the minority and say I would have asked my graduating son what he wanted. If he wanted his father and the wife there for his sake I would have sucked it up. I might have made sure to step on her foot really hard or something though.lol. If son had said I don't want my sm there I would abide by that too.
leadfoot40
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How long has it been. If it's been 1 year I totally get it. If it's been 10, you're overreacting.
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